


There's Nothing Time Can't Kill, Except Us Of Course

by bozanga



Series: My Shit On Tumblr [2]
Category: Ash vs Evil Dead, Ash vs Evil Dead (TV), Dead by Daylight (Video Game), Left 4 Dead (Video Games)
Genre: Cross-Posted on Tumblr, Cuties, Domestic Fluff, Fear of Death, Growing Old, Husbands, M/M, Old Married Couple, Originally Posted on Tumblr, Tumblr Ask Box Fic, [slight]
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-20
Updated: 2020-06-20
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:22:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,135
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24815266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bozanga/pseuds/bozanga
Summary: A one-shot request from my Tumblr @https://www.tumblr.com/blog/mintyfreshstories between Ash and Bill. Just some light angst and hurt/comfort, but mostly just these two being domesticated, senile love-birds.
Relationships: Bill Overbeck/Ash Williams
Series: My Shit On Tumblr [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1794913
Kudos: 11





	There's Nothing Time Can't Kill, Except Us Of Course

“Om nom nom.”

“Ashley _._ ”

“Ooom. Nommy nom nom.”

“Jesus H. Christ…stop…”

“Ooooooom. C’mon, lemme getta kiss! Please?” Ash’s annoying puppet voice finally made Bill cave. He’s been sexually harassed by that fucking puppet for about ten minutes now. He kissed the puppet’s ‘pursed’ lips and smacked his lips when the damned thing pulled away. He deadpanned at his lover as he tried pulling bits of grass and hairy fabric off his lips and out of his mouth. 

“See? That wasn’t so hard, now was it?”

“...”

“Hmmhmm, yeah. Knew it,” Ash smirked, turning his head to the left and forcing Bill into a kiss which was hesitantly returned. Ash was still getting Bill used to affectionate touches. But cuddling and occasional kisses was fine for the time being. 

The ex-demon hunter snuggled deeper against Bill’s military jacket and breathed in the scent of that exact same cigarette brand that Ash had grown to be so fond of now. It just reminded him of Bill all the time, really it’d remind anyone of Bill since the veteran always seemed to have a lit cigarette in his mouth. 

They settled into a comfortable silence and Ash couldn’t help but let his mind drift off a little. He always had something new to comment on (it wasn’t his fault his mouth was as loud as it always was), and suddenly, while he was ~~innocently~~ checking out his soldier, the topic of their age came to mind. It always irked him when he realized how old he was getting, but at one point it had become a sense of pride and another thing he could toot his horn about. All the youngsters in the Entity’s realm were amazed by his (along with all the other old timers) ability to keep up with them and even out-do some of them. 

And thus, another ~~comment~~ conversation topic arose.

“We’re the only damn thing that time can’t kill.”

“Motherfucker. Don’t ya dare start with that horseshit,” Bill had been the unlucky bastard to get attached to this fool. So much, that he learned and knew every inch of said fool. He knew this conversation was going to end with Ash looking like an idiot, which Bill was accustomed to, and Bill having a major headache. 

“I mean, look at us, Willie. We’re still fresh out the oven and burnin’ hot! Even in our old age!”

“Yeah, sure,” Bill couldn’t help his scoff, “we’re the epitome of young an’ healthy, Ashley,” the small nod of his head towards the demon hunter’s puppet prosthetic and the old solider’s own hand gesture to himself said that there was a challenge being proposed; one that Ash was eager to meet. 

“But just look at us, me more importantly, but you as well! We’re definitely fit, I know you can’t argue with that!”

“...”

“Hah! See, ya ain’t got nothin’ to say to that, do you, hun?” Ash crossed his arms over his chest in his usually smug manner. He sat up a little straighter, slipping out of Bill’s side hug and straightening his legs out so they could stretch and get ready to push him off the forest ground. In an attempt to show off his ‘yOuTh’, he practically jumped off the ground.

Okay, maybe there was a pop or two from his joints when he did that too quickly, but that meant nothing. N-o-t-h-i-n-g. 

“Hmmhmm, sure. C’mon, ya sorry bastard, we’re goin’ to the campfire. S’cold out here,” Bill stood, moving carefully because he knew his own body’s limits. His body was something he learned to listen to from all his years existing; rather it be on the battlefield, working those dead end jobs, surviving the apocalypse, or surviving here in the Entity’s realm, his body was the voice he didn’t always follow, but at least heard out. 

“Ah-oOO-aaAH-oKaY, uh, ‘ey, honey?” Bill’s sigh could only be described as that of a husband who was 99.93% done.

“Yes, sweetheart?” Poor, helpless Ash had no choice but to wilt in his current standing position. He nursed his right leg as his knee was in _I’m-burning-in-Hellfire_ pain and balanced himself awkwardly on his left foot, where he managed to somehow pull some middle muscle that made it difficult to move around and put weight on. The tree that they had been leaning against was his only safety net when he nearly wobbled over for the tenth time. 

“Er, mind helpin’ me out to the fire?”

“An’ why do I hafta help you? How did ya manage to hurt yerself by standin’?” Ash wilted further. 

“Heh, um, you see, my joints they, uh, kinda popped. An’ my foot hurts, so-”

“Yer on yer own,” Bill shook his head in marital disappointment and began to walk back to the campfire. 

“Honey! Willie! Babe, please! I’m actually hurtin’,” Ash pleaded, which he rarely ever did. His ego and pride were usually his biggest downfalls (and occasionally two of his biggest assets), so for him to put himself at Bill’s mercy…

“Ugh, fine. Yer a goddamn dumbass, just so s’clear,” Bill grumbled as he turned around. Ash’s eyes softened noticeably when he felt how gently Bill handled him. He kindly put Ash’s puppet arm over his shoulders to support Ash’s weight and let him lean almost all of his body weight on him, despite Bill weighing considerably less than him (the only person in this realm that ever saw Ash without his thankfully-very-convincing girdle was Bill). 

“Awwe, you don’t mean that, do ya sweetie?”

“I want ta divorce.”

“What!? No, I love you! Ya can’t- wait, we’re married?! How come this wasn’ official or nothin’?! Hun, we’re married?! Oh fuck yeah! I’m tellin’ everybody!”

Bill could only sigh again as he tuned out his husband’s cheerful but pained chatter. It was white noise to the old soldier, but a white noise he figured he couldn’t live without now that he had it. The small smile that formed on his lips, which still had hairs from the puppet fabric and the taste of dirt and grass, was immovable. 

While he wanted nothing more than to leave this realm one day with Ash and the others from the campfire (because despite the few survivors he formed rivalries with, he still grew to see those people as family) and, magically, end up in the same universe together where they could see each other and live normally, he also didn’t want to leave the Entity’s realm. Age didn’t exist in this realm; not really. If they were in the regular world, they’d have to leave one another behind at one point. One would end up dying first; but here? They could live together forever.

Ash is right, is what Bill realizes. There is nothing time can’t kill, but in the Entity’s realm, they’re the exception.


End file.
